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Ask Me How It Works: Love in an Open Marriage

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A beautiful, vibrant and surprising memoir about love, desire and marriage . . . one question at a time.

In the early hours of dawn in Amsterdam, Deepa Paul rises from her boyfriend's bed. She gets dressed, slips away with a kiss and cycles home, where she is welcomed into the arms of her husband, whose contentment is mellow alongside her own. There isn't a glimmer of shame, deception or guilt, only the honesty and compassion needed to make this kind of life possible - even if it wasn't always this easy.

You might have questions. Whose idea was it? What are the rules? Are you ever jealous? In this memoir, Deepa offers her answers openly and tenderly, as she explores the truth to questions of her own. Can I ask for what I want, and still honour the life I have chosen? Do I deserve it? Is it worth it?

Unexpectedly relatable and joyfully vibrant, this is one woman's story of discovering her own desires and how to liberate them, of shifting identities from mother to lover and back again, and of finding the courage to ask for the marriage she wanted, beyond the marriage she had.

One question at a time.


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An <em>anti-racist</em> social enterprise bookstore specialising in BIPOC books.
About Amplify Bookstore

An anti-racist social enterprise bookstore specialising in BIPOC books.

Only about 11% of books published are by BIPOC authors — so unless you specifically seek out books by BIPOC authors, you aren't likely to find very many of them organically. At Amplify, BIPOC authors are highlighted and celebrated. Here, they don't have to fight to be seen, and you don't have to fight to find them.

We hope that in our shop, you can discover a new favourite read, find stories that speak uniquely to you, learn about a culture outside your own (or more about your own histories), and gain a better understanding of the systems that connect us all.

Learn more about us

I’ve discovered so many new-to-me authors and the owners are so generous in their recommendations. Don’t follow the trends, set them! - let Amplify broaden your reading and sharpen your mind.

- Danielle B

If you're looking to expand your book collection to hear voices, perspectives and stories that aren't on blast from mainstream outlets then make your way here as quickly as you can.

- Samantha S

Within are thoughtfully curated books, and I was amazed to see a great diversity of authors. The atmosphere is cosy, calm and relaxed – just the perfect way to start my Sunday!

- Michelle W

I loved how inclusive this space was, there were dyslexia friendly books and a space for books about queer love, a bit of something for everyone.

- Sherine A

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Have a scroll through our tag directory to help direct your search and bring you to curated collections, as grouped by subgenres, identity markers, and more!

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